Behavior you don’t want to show on social networks

I’m completely fascinated by observing and analysing the behaviors that one can glimpse in social platforms and by the way in which people relate to one another.

How you connect, why you connect or why you decide not to. What it takes to step forward and connect with someone. How your perception changes in regard to someone you’ve never spoken to but who mentions you on Twitter one day. The empathy that arises with someone who suddenly shares an event with you. How much you can have in common with someone who’s seen suggested to you on Facebook or LinkedIn time and time again and whom you’ve never contacted until they contact you. Or the interesting, rewarding blog you discover one day when the person running it mentions your blog.

social media behavior

Behaviour you read between the lines

In the same way there is an unwritten contract in the social web, there are certainly unwritten and unspoken behaviors too. We don’t talk about them because it’s not in our best interest to point them out. However, that doesn’t mean they don’t exist:

  • Speaking greatly of great work carried out by others isn’t a sin (even if you don’t follow them or if they don’t follow you, you won’t be going to hell for it!)
  • Following someone, reading what they say, supporting them, sharing their projects, articles or videos, recommending them to possible clients isn’t a felony (even if this person doesn’t follow you, doesn’t always get back to you or doesn’t hang on your every word!).
  • Saying that someone you share your profession with (what someone might call “your competition”) is simply brilliant and counting on them for a project, a conference, a blogpost or a client won’t make you less respected, believable or influential. Quite the opposite!
  • Reading, sharing, following, mentioning, praising someone for sharing a programme, course, conference, tweet or anything of the kind, doesn’t really say anything interesting about you and doesn’t really add value to the other person or yourself. There is no real connection!.

They say that the social web is socialising but are we really sure about this? We become more select, twisted, Machiavellian, sarcastic, even cynical and intolerant. The only thing that’s changed, really, is that we can add a smiley at the end of every sentence, “J”, and then everything seems to make sense.

Let’s start by being ourselves, being honest, clear and direct. There’s nothing wrong with ending a sentence with a full stop; quite the opposite, it should be the most common and coherent way to do so. I find it really hard to believe you can get along with everyone or that you can refer to everyone as your “sweetie” or “dear”. It’s like you want to be at every party, be accepted by any circle of Tweeps or be chosen as a panel member at every social organisation conference.

I don’t think I’m a pessimistic type of guy, tedious or a cretin. However, I’m also aware I’m not interested in being worshipped or revered in the comments to my blog or in every tweet I get as feedback after a conference or in reaction to one of my own tweets. Whoever you are in your real life, so should you be in the digital world; otherwise, something’s not quite right!

  • The ways we connect are changing, we have new tools and trends. However, our values and personality shouldn’t be altered by such changes in our environment.
  • Answer back when you feel the need, not out of obligation.
  • Speak when you have something relevant to say, not because you’re supposed to say something.
  • If you need to be forceful with someone, you’re entitled to be so, but be prepared for an equally forceful comeback.
  • Empower the small people who do great things, not self-centered celebrities.

The key lies in our reaction to social (unfortunately, not human) stimulus.

I’m increasingly certain that we react to the “social” stimuli provided by the social networks. And I believe that “react” is the right word. The opposite of this would be to take initiative, to find something valuable (something that will normally happen right in front of us), pay attention to it, value it objectively and offer the acknowledgement that that person, product or project deserves.

If we limited our interest, anxiety, ego and arrogance to things that make a difference, we wouldn’t have to worry about what will happen if we act sincerely and with dignity!

Photo credit: stevenvanbelleghem.

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My Social Media Resolutions For 2010

It has been almost 3 weeks since my last posting,  my 3 words for 2010. Perhaps, it couldn’t be most proper moment to talk about the resolutions for this uncertain and puzzling coming year. If you’re a top blogger, a twitter fanatic, a social media addict or trendy enough, You may think this was a topic for being discussed at the beginning of January, that it’s not hot anymore or that isn’t going to increase the traffic through my blog and so on…but I don’t care, I really believe that’s what life is about, caring only for things are worth of it. I’ve been working on my resolutions for 2010 and my unique aim is to share them with you, hoping they empower your goals and encourages you to carry on with them to the end of the year, I might even want you to review and reconsider your resolutions – if applicable – Last but least, I’d like to see if we agree at some point  and comparing and contrasting mine with yours.

Undoubtedly, a big challenge where a great amount of effort is required!

My Prof. Resolutions

  • Managing my social time as Chris Brogan said in managing social media time. I’ll focus ½ my efforts on reading and looking for content, ¼ on comment and giving feedback and ¼ on creating and delivering content.
  • I’ll intend to spend no more than 4 hours a day.
  • Organizing my mind and get straight to the point, sometimes, when I’m talking with people I’ll get stuck and lose plenty of time trying to explaining details, which make no difference at all. Therefore, I’ll focus my efforts on omit these inefficient costly talks and get to the point.
  • I’ll follow my 3 words and develop my goals based on them.
  • I’ll be conscious about what kind of content I’m sharing, when I’m going to deliver it, to who and with what purposes.
  • I’ll work harder than ever to make my goals happen, I’ll start trying by doing and putting in practice and not by thinking and writing.
  • I’ll work when other slow down, when nobody knows, when nobody does (holidays, summers, Christmas, etc.)
  • I’ll work overnight, but, most importantly I won’t let anybody know how hard and long I work.
  • I’ll give thanks to my folks, my closest friends, my family, these people who has supported me unconditionally and has always been there no matter the situation, I’ll give them thanks and say how much I love them and care about me. I won’t let myself loose the contact with they neither.
  • I’ll share what I do and how I do, because I understand thank the knowledge don’t belongs to me, even though you, it belong to all of us. I’ll try to explain better what is going on around us for after sharing it.


  • Create my travel diary blog and post everyday.
  • Continue working on my newly pressed 2 blogs (Israel Garcia’s No-Blog and “Hablando Sobre Marketing”).
  • No more than 4 Tags per post and 3 categories.
  • Write short bur effective conversations instead of bring long and left-brainers posts.
  • Post regularly weekly in each Blog Monday-Friday.
  • Write longer and descriptive titles.
  • Build interest  and trust on my readers and catch their attention.
  • Make call to actions to truly call the readers to action.
  • Deliver the kind of content I’ve promised in the title.
  • Display my thoughts, expertise or whatever I might want to say mostly of the times in less than 600 words.
  • Write according what’s hot on social media and marketing.
  • Write thought-provoking posts.
  • Don’t spend more than 1.30min. blogging.


  • Build new professional relationships and connecting with more potential contacts.
  • Broaden my network preferably in the States as is from where I’d like to stand up.
  • Help empowering people, finding job positions, introducing new connections that make possible business or offering my services to their personal endeavours.
  • Sharing and exchanging all kind of content and knowledge with the people I’m connected with.
  • Create a LinkedIn group, with its own identity and values with the aim of being helpful for the crowd and offer those resources and content that make them better.
  • Being more active  on the discussions: participle in at least 2 daily (I’m in more than a 25 groups so, I guess I’ll have to pick the most suitable conversations according to my needs)
  • My great challenge on LinkedIn is Q&A: I’ll be responding at least 1 or 2 weekly.


  • I’ll create content through video posts delivering talks about social media and marketing, I reckon this approach will be more personal and engaging for the audience. Social media should be more personal and trustworthy, I’ve always though that human relationship is what really matters.


  • As I get stuck with so much daily info, I’ll remove from those readers and email lists, which I consider they’re not worth nor giving me value.
  • I’ll delete rapidly all kind of content that don’t meet my needs.
  • I’ll use the email only as a communication channel with people I’m not working with (friends, relatives, girlfriend, etc.)
  • I’ll be also more concise in terms of replies just to save time.
  • No emoticons, no fancy fonts, no colors, no “hello”, no “regards”, etc.

Google wave

  • Due to its collaborative functions, I’ll use it to work closely with my partners and even clients.
  • I’ll combine the waves with Google talk and Google docs to boost its use and make it more dynamic and efficient.
  • I’ll use it just when really makes sense and fits in my workflow.


  • Delivering and sharing worthwhile information.
  • Increasing blogs traffic.
  • RT best resources and links.
  • Delivering crossover content according with groups of targets.
  • Sharing inspiring thoughts and quotes.
  • Being more efficient, communicative and punchy in the 140 characters.
  • Decrease the number of low value users I’m following already.
  • Increase follower in terms of high value users.


  • Communicate and deliver specific content to my crowd.
  • Knowing how they are and what they’re up to.
  • Being in contact with my family, closest friends and people around me.
  • Increase the number of friends that truly know.
  • Searching interests according to my friends profile.

Now, I’d like to hear from you. What’s your take? Does this make sense? Do you agree with me? disagree? What are your social media resolutions for 2010?

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How Facebook Benefits your Business

facebook - human media

Have you ever suffered of a friend or relative that posted something corny, embarassing or even a photo that you wish that your current and prospective customers never see??

I think everybody who has a Facebook account it has passed through this at anytime. When this occurs is when we start looking for a way to keep our business safe and isolated from our personal life. Having a Fan Page on Facebook for your Business could be the solution. Here you have my 10 commandments

1 – Ease of  linking

From your fan page link directly to your website. Embed a fans badge on your web page allows visitors to instantly become a fan of your business. This also has an extra advantage with search engines because the visibility of any Facebook page (by the sheer power of Facebook ) is much higher than your website.

2 – Fans approval

People could follow your Facebook page without having been approved first (as with a friend on your personal profile on Facebook). This saves you plenty of time and makes it easy to build your tribe.

3 – Unlimited amount of fans

You have an unlimited amount of fans. At this time the number of friends on your profile limited to 5000. Nevertheless, you can have an unlimited amount of fans.

4 – Community

Because fans can comment on your posts and join in any initiative you embark, it creates a sense of community where they can share their thoughts and opinions. In addition, they can also post if they logged publish.

5 – Instant Mailing List

You can instantly send an update to all your members about special offers, events, releases, articles, etc..

6 – Disclosure daily

People connect and check Facebook every day. So have a fan page allows daily interaction with your readers. And unlike e-mail updates, you never have to worry because your message being caught in spam filters. That’s a big advantage!

7 – Relevance and Control

Fan pages let you keep your business communications fan page and personal updates on your homepage (profile). This would not upset your mother with information on the special 50% discount this weekend. And your customers do not have to read news and see pictures of your children dressed for Halloween.

8 – Increased exposure

Fan pages are public. All search engines and people can see them. This dramatically increases the potential for exposure.

9 – Viral Marketing

Even if your fans do not take the initiative to recommend your page to their network of friends and acquaintances, in the pages of all your fans are going to see your page. This greatly opens the exposure to other potential customers.

10 – Take precautions so you do not close the account

The Terms and Conditions of Use of Facebook explained that any commercial use of a personal account is cause for deactivation.

Broadly speaking, these are my “test=results” reasons of how Facebook benefit your business. Certainly, there are many more important reasons why you should create a fan page on Facebook for your business..

What is your take?  your reasons?

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Facebook from a different approach


Ask yourself

What if Facebook had different use from the one that social media experts spread? Have you ever wondered if Facebook fit into your professional social media picture? What is the relevance of Facebook into the business scene ?  What if Facebook would it be just for fun?

Undoubtedly, it may have some controversy around this issue. I do think these are good questions about the use of Facebook beyond user’s knowledge, worth to be responded. I’ve been wondering all this time about the Facebook relevance in our business environments too. What’s more, I’ve been talking with lot of professionals that use Facebook to promote their business. In fact, I’m developing Facebook strategies for my clients, but if you ask for my opinion…Personally, I’m always trying to keep it private, at least in my professional career you might ask why? The answer is simple, because broadly speaking we’re people of flesh and blood, we behave emotionally, act impulsively, to a certain extent we tend to be egocentric, not to mention curious and open-minded. Apart from this, we have the need to get away from our daily life or jobs and escape from the routine that often surrounds our lives for engaging with our friends, relatives, former classmates or even our lover… Furthermore, we know how much we like to gossip about what others do (friends, relatives, neighbours, partner,etc.) whether they have gone on a trip, have bought a new house abroad or where  they have been this weekend,…Unfortunately, it shows us one more time that everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives,but none about his or her own… Facebook no thanks

Use Facebook (for fun)

Imagine you’ve left your country a few months ago to work abroad [as I hope I’ll do in a few months in the States…]Consequently, you start a new stage, but you miss what you left behind, again, friends, family, colleagues and so on. Question: What will be the easiest way to know what your folk is doing or stay in touch with your girlfriend, close friends or parents? I’d say Facebook (clearly, Skype will work too, but you’d need to focus on the conversation and twitter also, but it has some drawbacks in real-time conversations and it isn’t as popular in some countries as Facebook) absolutely Facebook will be the best tool.

How you see it?

I see Facebook as a powerful social media tool, though let’s have a place where just have fun and engage with your people. Frequently, I’d like to remind myself this thought, “sometimes you need to switch off to switch on”. Nevertheless, It doesn’t mean you don’t use Facebook appropriately;

  • Segment your contacts
  • Give them different levels of permission depending on how they get on with you
  • Allow people to see what you want they to see
  • Let the people you know write in your wall, comment your stuff or label your photos/videos
  • Restrict your Facebook only for the people you already or may know.

But if you ‘wannabe’ professional…

No Facebook - Blessington St, St Kilda What about people who use Facebook professionally? Well, I bet they also want to go deeper in the relationships, you know Relationship Marketing knowing your customer…Although, are you sure you want to show where you spend your weekend, with who and how? What about your privacy? What about your personal life? I think it’s our commitment putting it aside, don’t you think so?

And you? How do you use Facebook? Do you use it for fun or biz? What is your strategy for doing biz in Facebook?

I’d like to know your thoughts.

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